Our life is hostage of time !
“jab bhii aankhon mein ashq bhar aaye,log kuchh duubate nazar aaye
muddatein ho gain sahar dekhe,koi aahat koi Kabar aaye
chaand jitane bhii gum hue shab ke,sabake ilzaam mere sar aaye
mujhako apnaa pataa thikaanaa mile, wo bhii ik baar mere ghar aaye”
I had some client meeting on some upcoming projects. I met him at South Delhi famous pub and there my lawyer friend joined me and then I got to meet this energetic girl who was good friend of my lawyer. During conversation I found out that she was working with some NGO, and only couple of months back she came back from London where she was working. She had big dreams for her future and that was very impressing.
In short span of time we became good friend; we had common interest of music, food and moreover intellectual thoughts. She always fought with me of my relationship hiccups I was going through at that time. She always blamed me for broken relationship and favored my partner with whom I was going away and from there she always called me “Hopeless Romantic”. She forced me to go back and start a fresh.
One day she called me and asked me if we can go out for some drinks, that sounded interesting to me as I had nothing much to do after my work and so I went. This happened many times and every time we discovered some new pub or lounge and other gang member joined in. We had good quality time.
On 4th August I got call “hey Amit … game for movie” …it must be 11 am and was not in mood to work so I joined her, we watched some new released movie absolutely not of my interest and I went to sleep in between, she kicked me again …oh movie over, she left and promised me to meet again.
She was going for some trip with other gang member …some trekking program on 11th August. She called me when she was leaving her place and insisted me to join …I had lot of work pressure and I told her some other time.
13th August 20, 2006: I was having my lunch and then my cell bugged me again …I heard some news from other side and then that glass of water dropped down and pieces of glass all over on floor…With sinking heart I checked with other friend …and then I called up at the guest house those 4 people were staying.
I saw those broken peaces of glass on floor and I could easily relate to them …
I couldn’t believe the news…I wasn’t ready to believe. She got drought away in river Ganga and it is more than 24 hour they have no news. She went with all the thrill of adventure and then she never came back.
Today I slipped my hand in my pocket and found something there … It was same movie ticket we saw together. On my table I have tickets of that Theater program of NSD we went together, today I listened to the same song she loved listening again n again while I’m driving.
“Aaj jaane ki zid na karo
Haay mar jaayenge, hum to lut jaayenge
Aisi baatein kiya na karo
Aaj jaane ki zid na karo..”
I guess I was the only one in group who knew that she is having a steady relationship with a guy who is in Navy…I have no idea who he is where he is …is he aware of the situation.
I wish she would have joined the course she was planning of in Pune then things would have not been like this…I wish she would trusted my instinct and would have opted out of that trek program…I wish I could have seen her last time … I wish I would have hugged her to tell her that how much it means to have friends like her…I wish …
“Waqt ki qaid mein zindagi hai magar
Chand ghadiyan yehi hain jo aazad hain
Inko khokar mere jaan-e-jaan
Umr bhar na taraste raho
Aaj jaane ki zid na karo
Haay mar jaayenge, hum to lut jaayenge
Aisi baatein kiya na karo
Aaj jaane ki zid na karo…”
You will always remain alive in my heart, in my thoughts, in my music.
I’v learned: This big loss need not be tears, need not be frustration, but sometimes we get so silent with life that to talk again, it takes a lot of time, Lot of effort, I have been through it before, this time I don’t even feel like coming out of it, There is a life, which I look forward to, alone or if someone comes along in the path to my destination…..I have no idea, I am not loosing hope on life, but somewhere ….. someone ….sometimes brings a smile or a void into life which no one can fill. I lost my love and then suddenly I lost my friend…and then we say “Keep moving…”
